I am deep in neuroscience research and training at the moment. As part of my continuous growth and development I chose to increase my knowledge about ‘brain-body optimization’.  It’s a thing.

It’s how our neurological and biological systems can work together to get us to reach a point of high-performance and thriving in life. (For the curious you can check out Neurozone). Of all the many new and fascinating things I learnt in this training, one thing that really stood out for me is that the brain is wired to collaborate. The brain has evolved to ‘work together or fail alone’. In our brains, there is a ‘driver’ called ‘COLLECTIVE CREATIVITY’.

The premise of this driver is the fact we are more creative, innovative and high performing in groups than we are on our own. The evidence shows that an individuals intelligence (g-factor) is ALWAYS trumped by the collectives intelligence (c-factor). For this reason, we need to work together to solve the myriad of problems we face as a species.

And guess what pushes up the collective intelligence?

DIVERSITY!!

So, according to our brains and neurology, we perform better AND become more creative when we collaborate, integrate and relate with a variety of ethnicity’s and cultural backgrounds. But how are we supposed to do that comfortably in a world that can barely stand to see two people with different colour skins hugging?

How can we reach a point where mixed races, multi-cultural, inter-faith relationships are the norm rather than the exception? When will we reach the point that we embrace diversity instead of fearing it?

Which leads me to the point of this article. (Finally, I hear you say 😉

Allow me to introduce you to my guest blogger, Ria:

“Ria is the editor in chief for the interracial dating site called Afroromance.com. She is ambitious and passionate about turning the world into a multi-colored community. Her goal is to spread the message of free love without the boundaries of colour while exploring the society and community built around this ideal. It is important for her and the website to inspire a new generation of people with a mind that is open to unity among everyone.”

Below is the article that she has written and that I am sharing with you, I hope you find it useful and beneficial:

5 Dating Tips for Inter-racial Couples:

Quality relations don’t just happen, they take time, patience, and two people who truly want to be together.

Let me be very honest, staying in an interracial can be a lot of fun but it’s definitely not going to be easy on you. You will be demeaned by society stereotypes and you will be required to deal with substantial negativity and humiliation. But sometimes fighting for your love is all you need in this racial world.

There are many interracial dating websites to choose from but are you aware of the basic tips to survive your first biracial date? Through this article, we will be exploring the ideas on how to handle your biracial relationship.

Why is an interracial relationship a great choice for you?

–    Because you have raised yourself above cast and skin color.

–    You are matured enough to understand the importance of true love.

–    You don’t care about outdated stereotypes, you do what makes you happy.

–    Interracial couples are making this world a better place to live in, these relationships are increasing diversity acceptance and slowly eliminating racism and hatred.

Let’s explore 5 most important dating tips for long lasting interracial relationships.

How To Make It Work

Before dating a person of different cast or race you need become familiar with basic guidelines for making it work between you both. If  you are totally clueless then you might get rejected on your first date..

–    Do your homework properly.

–    Focus to make things work in your favor, it’s important to believe in the power of love.

–    It’s important to stay humble and show a keen interest in knowing your dates culture.

Precautions

There are few precautions that need to be taken care; here is the list of basic precautions:

–    Know what you truly desire, is it just an attraction because of her skin tone or body curves? Infatuation is not sustainable and longstanding in an interracial relationship for a long time.

–    Self-recognition is important before starting an interracial relationship, society will question your decision and make derogatory comments. You must  self-analyze whether you are mature enough to deal with all the problems.

–    Although biracial dating is getting common these days,  you will still find people who are going to act negatively. Prepare yourself for considerable verbal attacks and learn to ignore them.

Communication Is The Best Solution

You need to develop extraordinary communication skills if you want to make a success of your relationship, let’s go through the basic communication tips with your date:

–    Keep the talks light for the first few dates, there is going to be cultural differences and you definitely don’t want to sound stereotypical just because of lack of knowledge about their culture.

–    You are trying to infuse to different cultures in one and it’s important to discuss each and everything in advance. Ask questions about everything from eating habits to earning habits and stay clear of your expectations.

–    If you have decided to take your relationship to another level,  it’s important to learn about traditional values and everything that needs to be taken care of. Generally, interracial couples are expected to take longer than people belonging to the same ethnicity.

Respect And True Love

Respect and love is the most important pillar of any relationship and we can’t leave this out in our top five tips:

–    We can’t deny the fact that racism still exists and you need to learn to respect their traditions

–    You are required to understand that no relationship is perfect so instead of starting a comparison you need to concentrate on the similarities you have so that you can concentrate on the positive part.

Feel Proud Of It

If you are not proud of your relationship, you won’t be able to make others feel positive about it:

–    Being proud of your relationship will make you stronger mentally and emotionally, being proud of your partner will fill you with the positive vibes that will assist in dealing with any difficulty.

–    Having fun is another way to maintain a stronger bond, go for outings, long drives, have a lot of sex, do whatever makes you happy.

–    You can also be proud of the fact that you are helping society work their way through breaking stereotypes.

–    You understand the power of love and are demonstrating that to others

 “Interracial relationship is going to be easy”; said no one, ever.

Love knows no boundaries and if your love is true, you will find the way to make it a success. Difficulties of interracial relationships can be overruled if you can keep these few pointers above in mind. Ultimately it is your own decision to make and you need to feel proud of your choice. Promise each other to stand by each other’s side.

Thank you Ria for sharing your advice and passion.

If we want the world to be a better place to live in, we need to embrace diversity. The bottom line is this:

1. large areas of the brain are dedicated to attachment with each other
2. we survive and thrive better together than alone
3. we are more innovative and creative when we work together
4. we function as humans better in groups
5. the more diverse the group, the more innovative, creative and high performing we are as individuals
6. compassion and empathy are essential for creative problem solving

If you would like to know more about my Dating Deliberately process, please make contact and we can set up a clarity call.