Dreams and Goal Setting

• What stops people from trying to realise/achieve their dreams?

The dream killers. We buy into the belief, imposed on us by others, that we will never achieve our dreams because they are unrealistic, inappropriate, idealistic etc. And, because those ‘others’ didn’t have the commitment, passion and discipline to pursue their own dreams, they feel disillusioned by life and then impose their negativity on others.

Other blocks to achieving goals include

1. Insufficient planning – not breaking your big goals down into small, discreet steps.
2. Insufficient knowledge – not doing your research before you take the first step
3. Poor Time Management – you need to become a better time juggler and know which balls you are prepared to drop when time becomes an issue
4. Unrealistic Goals – this is a form of self-sabotage, it guarantees failure and confirms your low self worth
5. Fear of Failure – failure anxiety or risk phobia is so high it stops you from following through with your plans
6. Fear of Success – for those who believe ‘the higher you climb, the farther you fall’ success brings with it a fear of losing it all

• Is there a difference between a dream and a goal?

A dream is a desire or a wish list. It fills us with endless warm fuzzy feelings and thoughts of ‘If only’, ‘Wouldn’t it be nice if’ and ‘I would love it if’. A goal takes away the ‘if’ factor, not leaving your fulfilment to chance. A goal typically has the steps we need to make (short, medium and long term) toward achieving our dreams. It has a plan of action, including a series of substrategies that allow you to move toward the desired end.

• How would you suggest a person change their mind set about whether they can achieve her dream?

Attitude precedes outcome. What you believe, you can achieve. Choose a new attitude that serves you and supports you into living a fulfilling, meaningful life and that includes pursuing your dreams. See a coach.

• What steps should one take to plan and work towards making your dream come true?

If you don’t plan, plan to fail. Get focussed to become effective. Write and read your goals regularly. Find out exactly what skills, knowledge and attitudes you will need to get what you want. Do selective and collective reading on the subject. Surround yourself with ‘succeeders’. Eliminate low priority time wasting. Organise your environment. Learn from your mistakes. Keep moving forward in some small way every day. When you encounter obstacles, think not in terms of blame but in terms of solutions.

• Are there instances where you would advise someone against following a dream they may have?

Yes, the dream must be compelling enough that you are prepared to move mountains for it. You have to know why it is so important, what difference it will make in your life and what the benefits of those differences are. The dream needs to help you become a-better-version-of-yourself. If it includes robbing another person of their dignity or hurts someone else, I wouldn’t support the outcome.